Inspired by Chef Floyd Cardoz, who serves a version at his restaurant Paowalla in New York, the recipe is proof that time and care given to eggs is worthwhile. And that scrambled eggs can be real life, non-sloth-person, company-worthy, proud-of-yourself dinner. No defense case necessary.
The eggs take an hour or so, start to finish; they require some ingredients you may not have on hand (tamarind, a hot chile, a slew of spices, cilantro); and I wouldn't recommend them as late-night, I'm-sorta-drunk food. And then there's the real hiccup: That you'll have to stir these in a hypnotic figure-eight motion for 15 minutes (maybe more).
But don't run away: These are worth it!
Ingredients1 jalapeño (less spicy) or serrano (more spicy), stem and seeds removed
2 garlic cloves
1-inch piece peeled ginger
1 teaspoon ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon turmeric
1/2 teaspoon ground chile powder
1/4 teaspoon cayenne
1 small onion, diced
1/4 cup canola or other neutral oil, divided
One 15-ounce canned diced tomatoes, drained
1 teaspoon salt
1 tablespoon tamarind paste
1 1/2 tablespoons vinegar
1 teaspoon brown sugar or jaggery
1 cup roughly chopped cilantro, plus more for garnishing